Meaning full narrative for your child and for a well organized life

 CREATE A MEANINGFUL NARRATIVE FOR YOUR
Child.     

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All of us seek to live lives that are coherent and meaningful. We want our

experiences to make sense. Our children especially count on us to help

them make sense of their reality. Our task is to teach them how to extract

meaning and purpose from life.

One of the ways in which we can infuse our children’s days with

meaning is through the creation of a narrative of their experiences. A

subtle yet powerful way in which we can help develop a narrative in our

children’s lives is by spending time with them, since our presence brings

continuity. When we are present for not only their big moments but also

their small ones, we accompany them on their adventure. Our emotional

connection and presence gives them a sense of coherence, order, and

organization.

We also engage in narrative-making when we remind our children,“Remember when you were eight, and we went to the zoo? You fell, and .

. .” There is power in weaving together our children’s memories, thereby

helping them make sense of their experiences.

Storytelling also provides an interpretive framework for our children’s

lives. I don’t just mean reading stories from books, but am thinking of

the power of a story such as Alex Haley’s Roots, which became a

television miniseries. We share with our children how they themselves

came to be, how they make us feel, how brave they are, how kind, and so

on. When children hear about themselves in a story, they are better able

to absorb what we are attempting to convey than were we to teach them

directly. Children love to hear stories about themselves because they are

eager to create a vision of who they used to be as a baby and how they

became who they are now. By relating such stories to our children, we

help them weave a narrative about themselves and their place in their

family and their world.

Encouraging our children to write their daily thoughts and feelings in a

journal is another way to help them make sense of their experiences.

Perhaps the entire family might sit for half an hour, such as on a Sunday

afternoon, each reflecting on the week and recording their feelings and

emotions. What a wonderful way for the family to sit in stillness and

activate the inner eye!

Rituals of togetherness are an important way of supporting our

children’s sense of connection. Whether we gather as a family for dinner

every evening, or perhaps at weekends if weekday schedules don’t allow,

or we join in a family cuddle every Sunday morning, rituals are a

rhythmic reminder of the importance of our togetherness. When childrenlearn to count on such rituals, they develop a sense of stability. As

adults, they will recall these rituals and draw on them for meaning. Of

course, it’s also important for families to celebrate key life-events, the

memories of which act as a binding force in a child’s psyche.

Children who grow up in families in which stories abound around the

table and during family gatherings lead lives that are undergirded with a

coherence and continuity that’s especially valuable during times of

stress. Having heard hours of stories about their ancestors, they grow up

with an internal narrative that lends them a sense of fortitude, resilience,

and courage.